mood: calm
music: 'autumn sweater' by yo la tengo
i was at starbucks about 3 hours ago, spending my sunday night like i usually do: with coffee and a cigarette. i noticed two girls with textbooks entering the store and proceeding to highlight things. one of them was a blonde wearing a lime green overcoat, and the other a doe-eyed brunette with a white cardigan and two strings of pearls. i was writing in my notebook about my ebbing sense of loneliness and listening to 'blue line swinger' by yo la tengo. it's an excellent all-purpose song. highly recommended.
then, about 2 hours ago, i was on my 3rd cancer stick when chris and allison showed up. after calling them over, we spent a few minutes chatting about the revelators show we went to last night at the troubadour. our ears are still ringing. it turns out that allison knew the pearl girl from school. her name is tessa. apparently very funny.
just before they left, chris told me to go talk to her, seeing that i was staring at her at intermitten intervals. of course, i remained firm in my wish to stay in my comfort zone. chris knows me pretty well, so he didn't push too hard. after a few minutes of mulling it over, though, i faced an internal struggle. halfway resolute, i made my way back inside and inched my way closer to my goals.
any girl that knows me well enough would know that this alone was an extremely rare sign of courage. i introduced myself to her and even followed up with a few questions. O_O
of course, any girl that knows me well enough is part of a long string of my failed attempts. she calmly answered my questions with short responses, all the while averting her gaze and making eye contact only when absolutely needed. call me pessimistic, but she hates me. no no, just kidding. just mild rejection. i took the ever so slight hint and bade her adieu. i didn't dare ask for her number. (give me a break, i already made a lot of progress.)
i don't think i'm very good at just going up to people like that. i need someone else to introduce me to people, and even then, it's still kind of tough.
4 comments:
Well, good for you!
I, personally, have no idea how to introduce myself to strangers, or pick someone up, or anything like that. I met my husband on the Internet, and consider myself very lucky. :>
And I'm shy, and I have trouble with eye contact, especially with people I don't know. So I probably wouldn't give a good impression even if I did somehow manage to muster the courage to talk to a complete and total stranger.
So good job! :)
yeah, i'm doing my best to see it that way too. i admit, i could have been a better conversationist, but i guess the only good lines come up 15 minutes after you leave. it's okay though because... huh? what's going on? who's this tessa again? selective amnesia seems to be kicking in. no! must...retain...learning experience...
mmm...euphoric ignorance...*drool*
I used to not be able to keep my eyes on one thing for more than, um, a quarter of a second when I was talking to people I didn't know well, but now, lo! I can approach strangers and talk to them, no problem, and my eyes remain calm and not jumping around. Like a miracle that came about rather slowly, but the going up to strangers thing was greatly aided by hanging out with my friend Lisa in Santa Cruz. She will invite anyone back to her table at a bar or cafe, and is willing to speak cheerfully and energetically to almost anyone, anywhere. So, I got the hang of it.
lucky...
and now for a seemingly random question:
i was just wondering as to which radiohead song is your favorite? i favor 'the tourist' and 'the national anthem', but there's a special spot in my ear for 'i might be wrong'. once you learn to play that magical riff, your life changes.
Post a Comment